a bomb shell drops! :(
Geez! I have no idea what happened. All I know is that I'm still not feeling well and on top of that, I'm bummed out and emotional now . . .
I stayed home from work today and was in bed allll day -except for meal times and snack times (I'd have to go downstairs to get food for Kryssa). Well, my whole self was waaaaay messed up today -from my stupid stomach problems that never got resolved, to 'other' stomach issues, to high blood pressure, to my head, to achy bones/muscles, etc.- It's been RIDICULOUS!! SO! What did I do? I let Kryssa eat in her room so I could get right back into bed asap! Tonight, Chris was doing the 'night time' routine and just totally blew up on me about the crumbs on her floor! :( I mean, I know he just vacuumed last week and said "please, no more food in her room". I respected his wishes and said "ok" about it. But seriously? No exception for today?! Really?!
It sucks! Some days are amazing and some days are back to where we were not too long ago... I had just said, yesterday, on my way home from work, during our usual phone conversation on our way home, that I'm so in love and Thankful to God how everything has been. And that I really pray that nothing came up and ruined it. I remember saying, "I really hope that we can manage to not argue about anything because we argue about stupid stuff sometimes and it isn't worth ruining how great everything has been. Let's be careful what we let bother us...." I had JUST said that yesterday -approx. 7pm- and then by 10:30pm he blew up about who knows what w/ Kryssa and that caused me to get bothered and then because I shared w/ him what bothered me --that bothered him even more!!! Go figure!
Today went on like nothing even happened last night . . . which I got used to because that's how it used to be for waaaaay too long. Then he finds out that I'm not well today and he was super sweet and caring. He came home and really made an effort to take care of me. He took Kryssa to go run some errands and get out of the house so I could rest and have some quiet time! I was so thankful for the way everything was going. He got home and had rented a wii game; we all played and had a great time. I had no idea what to expect next. :( I just don't get it. I may never 'get it'.
I'm so sad right now. it's hard to be around that 'sudden explosion'. :( I'm a verbal person -I will talk about what's bothering me and attempt to resolve them. Chris, on the other hand, is not one to talk things out . . . he just kind of explodes about what bothers him and then sometimes doesn't even try to explain what happened . . . he just goes on like nothing ever happend... IT SUCKS!! :(
I thought things were changing . . .
so far it seems like 3 steps forward and one step back --which is pretty good, I guess?!?!
and this is just me venting . . . don't judge, don't judge. :) We all have our obstacles and our way of handling it.